Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
