wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
