i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
