Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
