I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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