please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
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im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
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I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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