I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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