would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
