i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
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