Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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