Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
