Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
