the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize
