On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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