there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
