that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize