TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
