Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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