I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
No subtext here. People are naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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