just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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