I just made out with a guy for $7.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize