Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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