I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Randomize
