areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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