I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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