Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
