what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Randomize
