why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
