OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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