I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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