it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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