I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
