i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I have so many feelings about this burrito
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize
