why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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