Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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