Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
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