okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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