Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize