Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Randomize