and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
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If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
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Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
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