i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Randomize
