Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
