I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
