hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Randomize
