OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
