just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
