Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
