At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
