Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize