I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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